When Quitting Isn't an Option
I'll never forget the morning I sat in my car in the parking lot, unable to make myself walk into the office. Not because I was lazy or didn't care about my job—but because the thought of one more email, one more meeting, one more demand made my chest tight and my eyes sting with tears I was too exhausted to cry.
That's burnout. And if you're reading this, you probably know exactly what I'm talking about.
The advice you'll find everywhere is "take a break" or "quit your job." But most of us can't just walk away. We have mortgages, families, health insurance tied to our employment. The reality is that many people need to recover from burnout while still showing up to work every day.
It's hard. I won't pretend otherwise. But it's possible. Here's what I learned from my own experience and from talking to others who've walked this same difficult path.
First, Acknowledge What's Really Happening
Burnout isn't just being tired. It's a profound exhaustion that sleep doesn't fix. It's feeling cynical about work that used to matter to you. It's questioning whether you're even good at your job anymore.
For months, I told myself I just needed to push through. That I was being dramatic. That everyone feels this way sometimes. But burnout doesn't go away because you ignore it—it gets worse.
The first step is naming it. You're burned out. Not weak. Not failing. Burned out. There's a difference, and recognizing it matters.
Am I burned out or just lazy? If you're wondering, learn about the seven signs and how to recover from burnout. Am I Burnt Out or Just Lazy? 7 Signs You Can't Ignore. (How to Recover)
Important: When to Seek Professional Help
If you're experiencing persistent feelings of hopelessness, significant changes in sleep or appetite, thoughts of self-harm, or if burnout is severely impacting your ability to function, please reach out to a mental health professional. I'm a columnist sharing what helped me and others, not a therapist or doctor. Burnout can overlap with depression and anxiety disorders that need proper clinical support. There's no shame in getting help—it's actually one of the smartest things you can do.
Set Micro-Boundaries Immediately
When you're burned out, the idea of setting major boundaries feels impossible. Telling your boss you can't take on new projects? Saying no to overtime? That might not be realistic depending on your situation.
But micro-boundaries? Those you can control.
I started with my lunch break. For years, I ate at my desk while working. When I was recovering from burnout, I made one rule: leave my desk for 30 minutes. I didn't always leave the building. Sometimes I just sat in the break room. But I physically separated myself from my workspace.
Other micro-boundaries that helped: not checking email after 7 PM, taking my full 15-minute breaks, closing my office door for 20 minutes of uninterrupted focus time. Small things. But they created tiny pockets of relief throughout the day.
Try This: The One Non-Negotiable
Pick one boundary so small you can't talk yourself out of it. Maybe it's not checking Slack during your commute. Maybe it's leaving work at your official end time on Fridays. Just one thing. Protect it fiercely for two weeks and notice how even that small space helps.
Lower the Bar (Seriously)
This was the hardest lesson for me. I'm a high achiever. I take pride in my work. The idea of doing less felt like giving up.
But here's what I realized: when you're burned out, giving 60% might be all you have. And that has to be okay for now. You're not lowering the bar forever—you're lowering it so you don't completely collapse.
I stopped volunteering for extra projects. I did my core job responsibilities and nothing more. I let some emails sit overnight instead of responding immediately. I stopped trying to be the star employee and focused on being a functional employee.
Did anyone notice? Honestly, not really. The standards I was holding myself to were often way higher than what anyone else expected.
Reclaim Your Evenings and Weekends
When you're burned out at work, the temptation is to come home and collapse on the couch scrolling through your phone. I did that for months. But it didn't help me recover—it just meant I was numb at work and numb at home.
Recovery requires actually doing things that restore you, even when you don't feel like it.
I made myself cook real dinners a few nights a week instead of ordering takeout. I started walking after work, even just 15 minutes. On weekends, I did at least one thing that had nothing to do with productivity—reading for pleasure, going to a museum, meeting a friend for coffee.
These things didn't fix the burnout. But they reminded me that I was more than my job. That there were parts of my life that still felt good.
The Energy Paradox
You might think "I'm too exhausted to do anything after work." I get it. But sometimes doing nothing drains you more than doing something restorative. The couch-scroll loop keeps you stuck. Gentle activity—even when it feels hard to start—often actually gives you energy back.
Identify What You Can Control
Some things about your job you genuinely can't change. Your workload might be unreasonable. Your boss might be terrible. The company culture might be toxic.
But even in bad situations, there are usually small things within your control. Focus there.
Can you control how many projects you're assigned? Probably not. Can you control which tasks you tackle first so you're not doing the hardest stuff when you're most depleted? Maybe.
Can you control whether meetings get scheduled back-to-back? Possibly not. Can you control whether you take two minutes between meetings to step outside and breathe? Yes.
I started keeping a list: "Things I Can't Control" and "Things I Can Control." When I felt overwhelmed, I looked at the second list and picked one tiny thing to adjust. It helped me feel less powerless.
Talk to Someone Who Gets It
Burnout feels lonely. You look around and everyone else seems fine, so you assume something's wrong with you.
Find one person you trust and tell them what's going on. Not someone who'll tell you to "just think positive" or "everyone gets stressed." Someone who'll listen and maybe share that they've been there too.
For me, it was a former colleague. We started having coffee every few weeks where we could be honest about struggling. Just knowing someone else understood made the burden lighter.
Try This: The Five-Minute Check-In
Text a trusted friend or family member once a week with a simple rating: "How I'm doing this week: 4/10." You don't need to explain. Just naming where you're at and having someone witness it helps.
Consider What Needs to Change Long-Term
These strategies help you survive burnout while working. But surviving isn't the same as thriving. At some point, you need to think about whether this job, this role, or this company is sustainable for you.
Maybe you need to have a conversation with your manager about workload. Maybe you need to start quietly looking for a new position. Maybe you need to consider a career shift.
I stayed in my role for eight months while recovering from burnout. I used that time to figure out what needed to change. Eventually, I moved to a different department with better work-life balance. It wasn't quitting, but it was changing my circumstances.
You don't need to make big decisions right now. But don't ignore the reality that if nothing changes, burnout will keep coming back.
If you're having a hard time with your coworkers, you might want to check out How to Deal with a Toxic Coworker Without Losing Your Cool.
Track Small Wins
When you're burned out, it's easy to focus only on what's going wrong. Your brain is already stuck in negative patterns.
I started keeping a simple note on my phone where I logged one small win each day. "Got through that difficult meeting." "Finished the report." "Took my full lunch break." Sometimes even just "Showed up."
On really hard days, I'd read back through the list. It reminded me I was making progress, even when it didn't feel like it.
Give Yourself Time
Recovery from burnout isn't linear. Some weeks you'll feel better. Other weeks you'll slide backward. That's normal.
It took me about six months to feel like myself again while working full-time. Some people recover faster. Some take longer. There's no right timeline.
What matters is that you're taking steps, however small, to take care of yourself. You're not ignoring it. You're not just white-knuckling through.
The morning I sat in that parking lot feeling unable to go inside? I eventually did walk in. I got through that day. And the next. And gradually, with these small changes, the weight got lighter.
You can recover from burnout while still working. It's hard, and it takes intention, but it's absolutely possible. You deserve to feel like a human being, not just a productivity machine. Start small. Be patient with yourself. And remember that taking care of yourself isn't selfish—it's necessary.